Thursday, December 30, 2004

Waiting for Dorothy

Ministry of
The Christmas Spirit of Upper Management

This year, it's fabulous to be a corporate drone.
You are bidding on my Christmas Bonus!

I am an Aircraft Mechanic, and the company I work for, Horizon Airlines, has blessed me this year with: a wonderful Collectable coffee mug. It is made of Fine China. I know this to be true, because when I turn it over, it says china, in fine letters. It is adorned with printed images celebrating our sacrifices to the Company, thanking us for our hard work at the Company, and even takes credit for our skill and knowledge.

It comes with 1 piece of chocolate candy wrapped in golden foil. The cup originally came with 5 pieces of chocolate candy wrapped in golden foil, but my kids ate 4 pieces before I could stop them. I know this diminishes the overall value of this excellent Christmas gift. However, the included unopened chocolate covered graham cracker cookie certainly overshadows the loss of the 4 golden foil wrapped chocolate candies. The Crowning Glory of this Testament to the Spirit of Giving is the tea bag. Yes folks, Horizon Air pulled out all the stops when they ensured we had something to actually drink from the cup of Fine China.

One single teabag. The movie Christmas Vacation was based around the fact that [Clark] Griswold only received; a "Jelly of the Month" club membership from his boss. I got a teabag.

You see, when a Company like Horizon Air makes a little less than a BILLION dollars a year in revenue, we understand that a ham, turkey, or even a 7-11 gift certificate could potentially wipe out a Director or VP Holiday bonus, resulting in Christmas Tree Chaos. Therefore we do without. Year after year we are snubbed with $5 Blockbuster gift cards, to unsellable, poorly written, meaningless books about the Airline itself. The Mechanics at Horizon Air have had no raises in years, but thankfully the raises and bonuses never end for our upper management. The Spirit of Giving lives on at Horizon Air, except for those that make the airline great.

CONTINUE READING HERE, study the fine photos supplied, and then determine your E-Bay bid.

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