Tuesday, November 23, 2004

Peanut Butter Doesn't Go in the Fridge...

Shep's Thot 4 the Day: There's nothing remarkable about it. All one has to do is hit the right keys at the right time and the instrument plays itself. -- J. S. Bach

Mathematical Proof That Girls Are Bad

Girls in general, and girlfriends in particular, require large amounts of time, and large amounts of money to maintain. Therefore:

Girls = Time x Money

Using the well known maxim that "Time is money", we get:

Time = Money

So subbing into the initial equation yields the following:

Girls = Money x Money
Girls = Money2

The Bible says in I Timothy 6:10 that "money is a root of all kinds of evil." Since the Bible is true, then this becomes an Identity.

Money = √Evil

By subbing "Money" into the previous equation, we obtain:

Girls = (√Evil)2

Next we put the equation into simplest form (we must follow good mathematics principles):

Girls = Evil

There... Proof that girls are evil. Stay far far away from them. The closer the girl is to an actual girlfriend, the more evil she will actually be. This is known as the Naggy Clause.


"For the love of money is the root of all evil." (KJV) ...or "all kinds of evil." (NIV) I know it's just a well known joke, but when we quote the Bible, we should do so accurately. It's not money that's the problem, but the love of money.

According to the twisted logic of the joke, then, the root (square root or cube root?) of evil = (the love of money) or (love x money) lm = e^.5 Then, if e=mc^2, lm=(mc^2)^.5 = mc. So, lm=mc and therefore l=c Love is the universal constant for energy.


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