Tuesday, July 05, 2005


In which Appliances, household and otherwise, are Discussed, and the little-known Law of Timeslot Gluons is Postulated

I mentioned our run of bad luck with household appliances and automobiles recently.

The new fridge came yesterday. In the manner of all things, someone was home all day, and the delivery guys chose to come just before the forty-minute window when that person had to go out to retrieve HouseApe 2.0 from school. It worked out fine: they arrived, delivered, and were gone just in time for the person to be late picking up the child.

Usually, of course, the delivery truck would have arrived 20 nanoseconds after the car had left, or 20 nanoseconds before it arrived back again. When Athena the Laptop was delivered, same thing. The delivery guy arrived a couple of minutes before the Person Who Was To Recieve Delivery was due back from picking up HouseApe 2.0. Fortunately, in this case, our neighbor signed for the package. Nice lady.

However, this leads me to posit the Law of Timeslot Gluons. There are a class of particles in the universe that cause a powerful attractive force between the boundaries of the times alloted to any activity. This is the law that causes a boss to show up at your cube three minutes before you were going to slip out a half-hour early without telling anyone. It is the exchange of particles that causes delivery people to arrive at exactly the wrong time.

Further study is needed. I suspect that it is an inverse-square law, like the law of gravitation.

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