Saturday, January 01, 2005

What's New, Pussycat?

How To Write Yourself Out of the Good Books

I was doing so well with Gareth’s parents. I think they’re legends so I’ve tried hard to win them over with my Novelty Accent™ and a framed photo of the firstborn for their Xmas present. But then this morning Gareth and I were lazing in bed…
(and just lazing, mind - no funny business. Holidays were made for lounging in your scratcher, drinking endless cups of tea, listening to the radio and declaring, “I give you the gift of fragrance” before dropping farts with a strong note of festive Brussels sprouts.)
… when the doorbell rang.

CONTINUE READING

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